Sarah Smith’s Path to Healing

Hey, my lovely,

Today is a good day for me. I feel good. I feel amazing. I feel like I can conquer the world. I have a lot of days like that thanks to you! I know you can’t see it yet because it all feels so hopeless. But you are doing amazing! I don’t mean you now, but you in the past. You who were just fighting every day to survive! You who were fighting with not just your fears and your past but with yourself, your wishes, your patterns, and your longing.

I see you. I see how strong you are, and I see how tired you are! I see how you are moving forward, even though your legs feel as heavy as lead. I see how you are staying, even when you want to go, and for that, I respect you more than words could ever show.

You took your first step to healing, and you’re standing strong in that decision. Even though you had no idea how you were going to get to me, you knew that you would. Even when everybody thought you were delusional, you kept going because you had a dream. You dreamed of becoming me. And here I am, writing a letter to you that you will never read, but know in your heart that it will be written.

If I were ever to travel back in time and have one minute with you, I would tell you this: “What you have lived through is nothing compared to your willpower. Your compassion is the strongest thing about you, and your emotions are the things that make you so unique and lovable! Please keep going, because the day will come where you don’t have to be strong-willed or fight to be heard. The day will come where you can choose to just live and exist. I know you don’t understand right now, but you will. Thank you for being you.”

Your first step was accepting, but what really helped you succeed was accepting yourself and being what you needed to be.

What I hate most about your journey is that you were never allowed to just be a kid and that you had to wait until you were thirty to be taken care of and to feel safe! That isn’t fair! It never was. And that you said, “Well, that’s the way it is, but it’s still my responsibility to change how I deal with this,” is the bravest and strongest thing I have ever seen! I am in awe of you, and I am so grateful that I was allowed to experience life with you. I am also so grateful that you are at peace now and that you can relax now.

We made it, and I could have never done it without you!

Thank you!

Lots of Love,
Me