Sarah Smith’s Path to Healing

Hey me,

so I had a realisation yesterday, and I have to share it… It makes so much sense and connects so many dots in my brain. It feels like so many single thoughts that were just “floating” around in my brain have finally found that missing link.

It feels like finding a new world in a game. XD

I was at a workshop this weekend, and we were working on the things that were blocking us from reaching our potential, our goals, and our vision for the future.

When we were talking about my potential and my block, it became apparent that I am not allowing myself to fully step into the space that I could occupy. I am holding myself back because I am scared.

While doing the exercise, it seemed as though I was scared of doing it alone.

On my way home, I realised: it’s not about doing it alone and being there alone. It’s about taking something away from others.

I have this belief that if I take up space, then I am taking space away from someone else. If I take up space, then I will step on others.

Then I realised: I am operating from a “lack” mentality. I believe that there isn’t enough space for everyone. I believe that there is limited space and everyone gets a specific amount. I don’t know how much I am allowed to have, so I refuse to take the space that I want and just take what I need to survive. That way, I am sure that I am not taking away from someone else.

But that’s not how it works. There is more than enough for everyone! And if there isn’t, then we’ll just create more. Humans always create something when it’s missing. So why wouldn’t we do the same with space?

So I can’t take up too much space because there is more than enough. I can respect it if someone has already made space for themselves somewhere. But that just means I’ll find space somewhere else, and it will probably feel more comfortable because it’s made for me.

If someone tries to take the space that I have created, then ok. I’ll find a better spot.

Now that doesn’t mean I’ll just give everything away that is mine if someone tries to take it, but I won’t defend it to my death if someone truly wants it.

I also know that I built the space that someone has taken from me. So they will at best only have what I created, and usually they won’t grow beyond that. If they are unlucky, then it will crumble as soon as I remove myself from the equation.

I am the person who builds my space. I am the beauty of the space I am in. The view may be nice, but I am the person who created it.

I am allowed to take up space because there is always going to be enough for everyone. It doesn’t matter where I am because I am the reason why my space is beautiful. I am the reason why I am where I am and who I am. I am allowed to take up space because I know that I will never take anyone’s space knowingly.

I am allowed to take up space because I am.

Let’s find out how much space we can actually fill.

My current space feels so small now that I know that I am allowed to actually take up as much as I want.

There are so many more things that I want to try and do… I can’t wait to experience it all!

Lots of love

me